I was married in 1992 and had my first daughter a year later. Two more amazing children to follow and a life filled with lots of activity. Over the next 10 years I was in charge of our family household. I was the chef, cleaning lady, driver and activity planner. We were every typical married couple. We were in and out of counseling and hardly ever communicated. I just thought that was the way it was supposed to be so I went through the motions. Once my youngest child became school age I decided I wanted to get a part time job. I wanted to interact with other grown individual again. I got into the real estate business and I found that I was good at more than just being a house wife. This is when things really changed for me and how I viewed the direction of my life. At the 15 year mark my husband and I got divorced and my single mom adventures began.
After my divorce I dated through being set up, going out for happy hour and of course I did do online dating as well. I actually enjoyed online dating as I was very busy working 60 hours a week and then having to work the other hours raising 3 children. There were pro's and con's to the dating sites that I had been on and after awhile I just figured that I would be single for the rest of my life, raise my kids and have lots of money when I retire. I had given up on that fairy tale prince charming that I was going to meet. I figured that it only happened in fairy tale land. I would just be alone and happy!
It wasn't until 6 years later with several unsuccessful dates and relationships under my belt. I was at my work's industry trade show manning a booth. It was after the show I was waiting for co-workers to join me at a VIP event. I ran into an interesting gentleman who was kind of funny but, obnoxious at the same time. ( I liked it) He asked me if we were going to go to the VIP event that followed the trade show and I said, "Of course, my company is one of the sponsors!" I really did not think anything about it or him.
Later that night at the event I was handing out t-shirts. This same guy walks up to me for his shirt and I couldn't resist to give him a taste of his own medicine. He was on the slim side so as to be funny myself and get him back for his earlier behavior I said, "You must be an XL" as I had a nice smirk on my face. Boy! Was he fired up! As the night progressed I noticed that with all of our customers and vendors around I managed to run into this guy all night. His name was Aaron. He owned a pressure washing company. We chatted off and on throughout the night and it was nice. I thought he was cute, but I didn't think of it like a connection since we were at a work function and I would not typically ever date anyone that is related to my work. As the night got later people were starting to leave and head home. Aaron approached me and said that he was going to be heading out soon but, maybe if I had time we could grab a cup of coffee to chat about the industry. I saw no harm in that so I gave him my cell number and said something like you better not forget to text me! Well before I could get out the door to go home that night, I received a text from Aaron saying that it was nice meeting me and that he looked forward to coffee with me very soon. I replied that would be GREAT!
The next day Aaron and I text back and forth just small talk and then we actually decide to talk on the phone. When I got on the phone with him if felt as though I was talking to an old friend. We didn't want to get off but, we decided to so that we would have something to talk about when we saw each other. Originally I told him I couldn't meet for another week, but I was very intrigued and rearranged some thing so that we could meet for dinner that Saturday. We meet at a mutual place and then take one car and go out to the gun range. I had never done that and thought that it would be fun and it was. We had the best time. Then after we had an amazing dinner with long conversation about everything. Growing up, our parents, our marriage, our children our friends and everything in between. We talked all night! (Literally all night) After that night I knew that I was going to be with this man for the rest of my life!
Three great months later we went to the opening game for the Mariners. When we got home Aaron suggested we take a bath since he knew how much I loved to soak in the tub. Previously, he had bought me a box of Lush goodies that had the packing peanuts in the box that are scented and they dissolve when you put them into the water. Once we were in the tub Aaron handed me a ball of these peanuts and said, "Feel this when it dissolves. It feels really weird on your hands." As the bath ball was getting smaller and smaller in my hand I felt a circular hard, heavy item in the middle. I looked at him and he looked at me and I knew immediately what it was! The most beautiful ring I have ever seen! Aaron and I got a little emotional and that was one of the greatest moments in my life! We found TRUE LOVE!
Why did we start a dating service?
Both of us were so excited and inspired by meeting each other. We want everyone we meet to experience how we feel. We have so many friends that give us the same horror stories about their dating experiences and have met many people that stay in unhappy relationships just because it is convenient. We wanted to have a personalized matchmaking service that really delved into personality traits and help with navigating through what those traits mean when being in a relationship with that person. In addition, we also understand that some people are too busy or just need help in being introduced to someone special. We feel that if you are going to spend a large majority of your adult life with someone day after day the only way to be is happy. If you understand from the start what you are getting into it will help you make better decisions whether the relationship is right for your personality.
I had been in a relationship and married for over 11 years. The hardest thing for me after my split up was the thought of being able to fall in love. I truly felt that the possibilities were very low to be deeply in love with someone. I went through the motions in my marriage always feeling like there was a better match for myself, but moving forward with life as if it had a predetermined route for me. During those years of marriage I went to counseling and began to really understand what I needed in a partner to have a successful relationship. Part of that is understanding who you are and knowing where your strengths and weaknesses are.
One major thing I learned is opposites may attract, but they do not stay together.(or at least very happy)
I had typically been a long relationship person. This time I wanted to explore the single world for awhile. The timing was perfect we just had a crash in the economy and being in the real estate business I had lots of time on my hands. I said to myself that I am going to be as good at picking up women as I was in business.
So I applied the same techniques I would use at getting business to approaching women. I found myself going out 3 to 6 days per week and meeting many great people. Typically I would go on one to two dates a week all with people I met out and about. Each time it only took one date to know that I really didn't want to be with that girl in a serious relationship. I had always hoped I was wrong and gave it time to really see if my gut was right. After awhile I thought I would try various dating sites to see if I could have more success in finding the perfect partner for me. Of course I went to the so called "Best" online dating sites in the industry. What I found was a very unrealistic way of dating. Everyone put up their ideal mate and information about themselves. Women get 100 to 200 emails per day and guys are lucky to get a response. So overwhelming for the gals and frustrating for the guys....I'm talking about the average guy not the one who photographs like a model. Lol
This is what I mean by unrealistic. I found times when I contacted a girl with your basic "Hi, I read your profile it looks like we could be a good match, let me know if you would like to chat sometime." The response was terrible. Once I got wise to the system that same girl I may read something on their profile and comment about it and the response rate was 80% better. On one site I would get over 50 "perfect matches" a week, but they never take into consideration looks. I'm not sure if the programmers are from America, but most people I know want to have some type of physical attraction towards the person they go out with. Anyways, I did feel like the personality system they used was better and I met a few really great women from that site I thought I could almost date seriously.
Three years later and my routine was the same. I started believing that I could never fall in love again and that I was scared from my previous marriage to the point that I would want to stay single for many more years. That is when I met Mayumi. We happen to both be at a trade show manning separate booths for an industry we both did business in. I saw her at the end of the show just standing by the escalators with a friend. I was with my business partner and asked him to wait for a second. I walked up and tied my shoe next to her and started a quick conversation mostly playfully teasing her. I found out that she was going to a VIP event across the street that I was going to as well. I remember telling my partner, "Watch by the end of the night I will get a date with this girl". When I got to the event she was busy with her customers, but I got to experience her wit and confidence which really intrigued me. By the end of the night I was lucky enough to fulfill my prophecy and asked her on a date in which she obliged.
We talked on the phone that next week which was strange to begin with because I was used to the dating worlds favorite thing, text messaging. The conversation felt different with her which only intrigued me more. We set up a date to go to the gun range and then dinner. (Neither of us had ever shot a gun) By the time dinner was over I was so inspired I told Mayumi that I had met my match and wanted to only be with her. I had never felt that for anyone ever in my life it was crazy! Within 3 months I asked her to marry me.